A PRAYER

A prayer I wrote way back March, 2010. The past YOU can sometimes be a source of encouragement to your present self. 

“

Lord, thank you for loving me this much, even if I don’t feel that much.

Thank you for the everyday struggles I have; that means that the good in me is still battling against the bad.

Thank you for giving me opportunities — a lot of them— to wait, to seek, and to be patient, even if I just fail most of the time.

Thank you for the discomforts in “what is”— because they keep me longing and hoping for “what is to come.”

Thank you for the promise of redemption— not only from sin, but also from who I’m not.

Lord, thank you for this love…even if it’s beyond my senses, beyond what my heart can contain.

Lord, I may not sometimes be able to choose what I feel, but thank you for the that I can still choose what to BELIEVE.

Lord, give me the faith of a child. Help me believe that I AM LOVED; that I MATTER to YOU; that I’m PRECIOUS; that I’m WORTHY; that I’m SPECIAL; that YOU DELIGHT in me—- even if the world in and around me makes me feel just the opposite.

Lord, give me back I used to have, a heart that refuses temptations because it doesn’t want to hurt you; and a heart that desires to do good because it wants to please you.

Lord, make my heart tender so that it would grieve with you and rejoice with you, as well.

Lord, I want this numbness to go away. I want to feel that I’m still alive.

Help me gather myself back every time my world scatters me inside.

Help me rest my security in you alone— in my worth as your daughter.

Thank you for this trust you have for me— even if I don’t deserve it. Help me trust you in return, because you deserve it.

In Jesus’ Name, Amen"

IN SPIRIT AND IN TRUTH

My church, Victory Christian Fellowship's annual Seven days Prayer and Fasting is about to end. And attending prayer meeting every night these past few days reminded me of something I've read from Rick Joyner's The Call, which touches me every time... I hope that for you, it will be the same. :)

"...Then I was in a different place, beholding a worship service in a little church building. As sometimes happens in a prophetic experience, I just seemed to know everything about everyone in the battered little room. All were experiencing severe trials in their lives, but they were not even thinking of them here. They were not praying about their needs. They were all trying to compose songs of thanksgiving to the Lord. They were happy, and their joy was sincere.

I saw heaven, and all of heaven was weeping. I then saw the Father again and knew why heaven was weeping. They were weeping because of the tears in the eyes of the Father. This little group of seemingly beaten down, struggling people had moved God so deeply that He wept. They were not tears of pain, but of joy. When I saw the love that He felt for these few worshipers, I could not contain my own tears.

Nothing I had experienced gripped me more than this scene. Worshiping the Lord on earth was now more desirable to me than dwelling in all of the glory of heaven. I knew that I had been given a message that could help prepare the saints for the battles that remained on earth, but now this did not mean nearly as much to me as trying to convey how we could touch the Father. Genuine adoration expressed by even the most humble believer on earth could cause all of heaven to rejoice, but even more than that, it touches the Father. This is why the angels would rather be given charge over a single believer on the earth than to be given authority over many galaxies of stars.

I saw Jesus standing next to the Father. Beholding the joy of the Father as He watched the little prayer meeting, He turned to me and said, “This is why I went to the cross. Giving My Father joy for just one moment would have been worth it all. Your worship can cause Him joy every day. Your worship when you are in the midst of difficulties touches Him even more than all of the worship of heaven. Here, where His glory is seen, the angels cannot help but to worship. When you worship without seeing His glory in the midst of your trials, that is worship in Spirit and in truth. The Father seeks such to be His worshipers. Do not waste your trials. Worship the Father, not for what you will receive, but to bring Him joy. You will never be stronger than when you bring Him joy, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.”

WORD THAT'S BEEN IN MY HEAD: DETOUR

God, I don't REALLY know what will happen next. All I know is that you can make every detour I face, a turn to your unending grace & to your will that is always the best. Now, I can smile again. :)

Today, God answered one of my prayers. I don't know why God prefers a slow unfolding of His will in my life. It is agonizingly slow-- according to my timetable, though. But I appreciate that "answer" today. At least, He has lessened the fog in front of me, just enough to show the next step.